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3 Lies We Tell Our Children, Hoping They Are True


My daughters Libby and Portia are two and four years old and I lie to them on a daily basis. I lie, and I smile, and I take care of them by guarding them from fear and the Boogeyman of Real Life. That is my job, my duty to them as their Mama.

Here are the three lies I tell my sweet little girls on a regular basis. I wonder if you will find your own words, your own lies in these three?

1. You Are Special.
My two darling young daughters are beautiful. They are creative and passionate and amazing. They are made in God’s image and are breathtaking examples of His love for me, for them, for all of us. But they aren’t anything special to the rest of the world. Someday they may make a lasting impact with their kindness and intellect by doing good in third world countries or short term good with their beauty and savvy as fashion models. But more likely than not, they will be average folks in a world that values only what our media system deems worthy enough to trend on Twitter that day. Maybe I almost hope my daughters are never special. I will tell this lie to them because in my heart, within our circle of family and friends, they ARE special. I will tell them this lie because I want to give them a chance to define this word and themselves long before the world does it for them.


2. The Good Guys Always Win.
I just reassured my four year old daughter Portia that Toy Story 2 is OK for her to watch even though she gets scared. I told her “The good guys win! The good guys always win!” This is a lie. The good guys do not always win. They just don’t. Sometimes an evil, sick person comes into a movie theater or an elementary school and just kills people. No matter what happens after that, some “Good Guys” have lost. Someday she will be hurt by a catty girlfriend who talks behind her back. She may fail an exam she studied hard for and then her car might get broken into. Someone she loves might not love her back. Bad things happen to good people...that is just part of life but my sweet young daughter doesn’t need to learn that lesson just now. She is only four years old and learning new things already every day. I will let her focus on the good things in life and let a scraped knee or "no third cookie" be her biggest sorrows.


3. Mommy/Daddy Will Always Come Back.
My husband John and I get date nights so often I hardly think about walking out the front door and away from my kids. (Oh, lets be honest...any mama who gets to leave the house and their precious kidlets behind moves pretty fast!) I often am in the car before I realize I didn’t kiss one or both of the girls goodbye. I imagine my gastly death in a car accident...my last words to my kids of no consequence. No last kiss or "I love you" for them to carry forwards without me in their little lives. Like when my mom died. There was no expected end. We were supposed to have six more months before she died so I knew she was dying but we all thought there was time. And so...I know parents die. We all read the news and the horrors of reality. Any parent’s greatest fear is the illness or death of their child. One step below that is fear for their own death. I cannot bear the thought of my daughters loosing anyone, anything they love, but I must accept it is always a possibility. I choose to live well to the best of my ability and leaving nothing unsaid. I succeed, I fail, but above all I just love them the best I can. And I lie to them, telling them I will always come back, because that is how we protect our children. That is part of how we love them.

What lies do you tell your children? What lies were you told? Share below in comments.


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